My newborn baby boy had heart surgery today.

That headline is probably a little gut wrenching to read. I thought it would be hard to type but it was actually relieving more than anything.

This has been one of the longest, most emotionally trying weeks for me and Jennifer but today we’re resting easier. Dr. Katsuhide Maeda successfully completed a repair to our baby Diego’s aorta at approximately 11 a.m.

I’m not exactly sure what drove me to write this but it felt important that I did. Maybe it’s so that eventually Diego can get a sense of what Dad and Mom felt during these difficult first few days of his life. Maybe it’s to just get things off of my chest after months of sitting on the knowledge that we would face this day — which still feels dreamlike and surreal. It’s definitely partly because I have to share my love and gratitude for the team of friends, nurses, and doctors that have helped us through some pretty low points. But whatever the reason, here I am: Sleep deprived but smiling because this incredibly disquieting day is almost behind us.

To get you up to speed…

About 4 months ago we learned about Diego’s moderate heart defect. The awesome eyes of Dr. Sarah Y. Lee and her team at Obstetrix in San Jose spotted a slight narrowing in his tiny aortic arch during his first echocardiograph. The aorta is our biggest artery and allows the blood that’s pumped out of the left ventricle to travel up and out to our bodies. At the top of the aortic arch is where there are three branches that feed blood up to the brain, lungs, and body. Just past those branches, as the arch comes down and turns into what’s called the Descending Aorta, is where there was a narrowing. That narrowing of tissue, if not corrected, could have led to major issues down the road.

The surgery basically cuts out the narrowed portion at the start of Diego’s descending aorta and stitches together the wide portions so that strong and steady blood flow is achieved out of the heart. Needless to say, there’s a lot more to it than that but I don’t have the vocabulary to articulate it better than this set of illustrations shows you. Interesting side note: These illustrations were created by the same amazing hands that performed the surgery today. I will forever be Dr. Maeda’s biggest fan but this just puts him into a whole other category of appreciation.

We by no means believe all the hard stuff is over. We know there’ll be plenty of reminders that take us back to today and the weeks leading up to Diego’s surgery. But we’re also reassured the worst part is past us.

The best things so far:

- We had the constant, awesome distraction of our baby girl Harlow.

- We just happen to live near one of the best hospitals in the world that performs corrective heart surgeries.

- We knew about this pretty early in Jennifer’s pregnancy and were able to prepare both emotionally and tactically with Diego’s team at Lucile Packard.

- I work for a remarkable company that offers support in so many ways for families that go through this sort of thing. I’m eternally grateful for Facebook, it’s culture of caring, and it’s community of amazing people who are a constant reminder to put life before work.

The toughest things so far:

- The recurring realization that so many families experiencing this type of thing do so without any of the aforementioned blessings.

- The unsettling weight on our family leading up to the surgery. There was no way of knowing how things would play out and certainly nothing that would keep it far from our mind.

- After delivery, mom and dad had very limited time with Diego. God, did this suck. Most folks, especially parents, will know how precious the initial skin-to-skin time is with baby. Immediately following delivery mom was able to hold and hug him, but it didn’t last more than 4 or 5 minutes as they needed to cart him off to be re-examined thoroughly by the team at the hospital.

- Jennifer experienced serious hemorrhaging the night after delivery. As scary as that was in and of itself, the additional recovery time set her back another day or so before she could spend more time with him in the Neonatal ICU.

- Being discharged and leaving the hospital without Diego. Everything in your body is screaming to be with and near your newborn.

- Managing what we were feeling along with trying to keep things as normal as possible for Harlow.

A couple of takeaways:

- Unexpected and really hard life experiences can help us move towards becoming the best versions of ourselves. And shifting in that direction with or without the help of things like this is absolutely necessary for getting through the next unexpected and really hard thing life throws at us. While we would never want to live through this again, Jenifer and I are closer than ever to one another and to the people who held our hands along the way.

- There was nothing but love and positive energy around Diego when he came into this world. With the dust settling, one thing is becoming increasingly clear to me. That as we become more connected to the world outside of what feels like a bubble — with all of the crazy and sometimes terrible things that come with it — I’m more hopeful today than ever before. We can imagine people saying things like “why would you want to bring a child into this world?”. For us, the answer is simple: Because it gives us hope. In those fleeting and precious first moments of bringing a life into the world there’s only love. There’s only care and compassion from hard working people trying to make everything right. Knowing that exists — even in small pockets of situations similar to ours — gives me hope that it can happen everywhere for everyone someday.

Diego Cruz De La Rocha, born on Monday July 18th, is now recovering peacefully in the amazing, caring hands of our new friends at Lucile Packard Children’s Hospital in Palo Alto. The staff here has lifted us up more than they’ll ever know. They gave us constant, warm reminders to take care of ourselves emotionally and physically so that we can give that care to others. These past few weeks we’ve been able to cross paths with some of the most incredible people we will ever meet. All of whom had the biggest hearts and caring souls you could imagine. It’s easy to lose sight of how important these individuals are to our community until you are faced with this sort of thing. I’ll never take them for granted.

We’re looking forward to his quick recovery in the weeks ahead.